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:iconyour-methamphetamine: More from your-methamphetamine


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Submitted on
October 23, 2012
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can you hold my breath for a little while? it aches my lungs
and i've just been running out of it lately.

i crave for days where you smile that wide at the sight of a talisman
i got made for you. you'll clutch on to it and guard it forever, won't
you?
                                 when my pendant will glow with the
                                 ordinary light of logic and what-is-
                                 right, you'll find that we don't live
                                 to hurt. but to discover.

my breaths are jagged and my words hoarse like the unexpected brawl of
autumn and winter -- which is prettier? we haven't fought about that
on the dinner table yet.
schedule it before the blackhole supernova that we knew was going
to happen sooner or later.
that is a time frame, isn't it?

i always kinda liked sooner better
i'd rather just be happier first and have pieces to clear
up later, you know?
each nanosecond of memory space with you
makes me feel like a terribly obsessive art-collector
in the Louvre during a fire; i
grab what i can and free it before i perish myself.

i wish i could free you but you're stuck here holding my breaths for me
you're stuck here because you want to and it scared me
up until you smiled so wide, the sun winked and lost its light forever

it never shone again.
and i cannot thank you enough.
but till i can find the words to, can you hold my breath for a little while?
it aches my lungs
and i've just been running out of it lately.
.
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:iconsammur-amat:
Gawd, Cass, sometimes its like you're fluttering inside of my cranium and rib-cage;
A phosphorus glow-in-the-dark rainbow-colored goo
-that's you and your words.

Yeah, you're my secret stash:heart:

each nanosecond of memory space with you
makes me feel like a terribly obsessive art-collector
in the Louvre during a fire; i
grab what i can and free it before i perish myself.


This. :faint:

I wonder what aches the most? The longing while in love or the longing pre and post the passion? I've yet to figure that one out myself, you see.

This piece is a beautiful highlight on the ache that ensues even while love is reciprocated and pursued. Not many people can say things as eloquently as you, doll. Always bear in mind the beauty of words are much too special to ever be allowed a chance to go into hiding.

Congratulations on such an accomplished piece! :tighthug:
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:iconundertheshaydewood:
UndertheShaydeWood Featured By Owner Oct 24, 2012
you've caught my breath - i love the "unexpected brawl of/ autumn and winter..." there's such a subdural, cranial spark when you say, "can you hold my breath for a little while?" And i love the effect of the line "i've been running out of it lately." It creates such a fragility and vulnerability. I have to say, though, that there's an image that seems to violate the tone and mood and content of your poem, "nanosecond of memory space." It stands out as something too technical and digital for such a wonderful poem in which a talisman is clutched and guarded.
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:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2012  Student Writer
aww i'll try something else.
thanks again! :heart:
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:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
each nanosecond of memory space with you
makes me feel like a terribly obsessive art-collector
in the Louvre during a fire; i
grab what i can and free it before i perish myself.


This is great. I like it when writers get specific like that with their imagery - makes it feel, I don't know... authentic, hand-crafted.
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 24, 2012  Student Writer
thank you so much <3
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:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Oct 24, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
you're welcome :)
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:iconhfeather53:
Hfeather53 Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Lovely.
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:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 24, 2012  Student Writer
:heart:
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:iconglossolalias:
glossolalias Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2012
those first lines :heart:
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:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 24, 2012  Student Writer
your gallery :heart:
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:iconsurrealcachinnation:
SurrealCachinnation Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2012   Writer
when my pendant will glow with the
ordinary light of logic and what-is-
right, you'll find that we don't live
to hurt. but to discover.


Yes.

I love this poem. It says a lot about relationships. And about people.
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