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read out here: soundcloud.com/c-e-moore/a-tri…

I'll say this once;
you were not my idea of forever.

our first words to each other were not
profound, our first meeting was a shitty
distance call that kept
hammering to a stop, not
stammering the way you did;
commas and commas (not even a fucking
semicolon) of anxiety struck me nowhere
near poetic but that's something only
my mind couldn't quite wrap its lithe
fingers around.

"what's the 'chase'?" you asked, with nothing
as much as a cowering glance in my
unwavering direction. "a game you play to see
how much you can fuck me over without ever
touching me." silence ensued as all great
moments do.

"I would never do that to anyone."

how predictable.

you followed the delicately decorated bread-crumb
trail I had set for myself, once you'd
freed me of the duty to be your temporary
solution to a smile, but it never ended.
and I was a copper-red solution too
unreactive for you to nullify.

I had you pegged, didn't I?

you didn't respond with something I needed my
cochleas to lick and absorb
no, you crept your warmth from the sides
of a venus fly trap - kissed through the towers
of ambush and abrasion to find yet another
piercing gone wrong embedded in (almost) my own
layers of hardened skin.

I had to submit you to curse for me,
to moan like you mean it, to
grab my hair and bend me over to the commas
you never ran out of, those
line breaks I found odd that you couldn't
translate my spine into.
of course, that bent yours,
clouded your sights with one
hell of a climax and then, I had a possessive noun
tattooed on every inch of my (almost)
skin.

mine
mine
MINE
                        SHE'S MINE
let the world know
but my world consisted of far less
now. the table of contents included one
word, one name, and one index.

"set sail," you had breathed into the troughs
of my neck and the crests of my chest, "we
set sail long before you said yes."
but I was already anchoring a ship-
wreck, you denied it, you
fought it, you fought
me.

you
yelled for me beyond
the screams and yearnings of sirens far
closer to you than I'd ever be
                        I'M YOURS
                        I'M YOURS

but I only wanted you to be your
own.

may day wasn't your idea of surrender,
but murder was. this ship crashed into
the rocky shores of aquatic myths and stories
I had told you so you'd own me, but they
were gone. I
was gone and now you
were your own to hold.

it didn't take long for me to cower into
your commas (no semicolons) now
seeping their way to my coming undone, my
consistent sum
of presumptions of you - you were always
more than awkward pauses and island
pendants that meant more carved truths than
six foot promises. you were more than bowed heads
and rolled rosary beads and incomprehensible hymns,
more than badly formed letters and love notes
from divorced lovers.
 
you were more.

I crawled into a wet cabin you resided in,
woke you to clutch on to my burial dress -
had you smell the sea-bed now kissing the rises
and falls of my unearthed pride,

"I'd rather stay here, if you'd let me."

you did.
this
this took too much out of me

half of it I can probably leave for the pitbulls to tear apart
but it means so much, as half-assedly as it's done

--

edit:
reading done here: soundcloud.com/c-e-moore/a-tri…
Add a Comment:
 
:iconshehrozeameen:
shehrozeameen Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
(deep breath) (wide stare) (complete silence for ten straight minutes)

(presses fav) (can't type anything on comments except responses)
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2013  Student Writer
oh dear :hug:
that's kind of how I submitted this poem
Reply
:iconshehrozeameen:
shehrozeameen Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
(nods)
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2013  Student Writer
(hit too close to home?)
Reply
:iconshehrozeameen:
shehrozeameen Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
(sigh) (nod)
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2013  Student Writer
accept my love then :stare:

:huggle:
Reply
:iconshehrozeameen:
shehrozeameen Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
(nodding) (smile)

(gulps) (deep breath) you're an awesome writer... I've never been this deeply moved since... the first time I came here on dA...
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2013  Student Writer
lol the gulp. I'm so loving, don't be scared.

aww, thank you!
Reply
(1 Reply)
:icongadgetsmith:
Gadgetsmith Featured By Owner Oct 24, 2013  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
About that "Muse" thing...
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 29, 2013  Student Writer
hm?
Reply
:icongadgetsmith:
Gadgetsmith Featured By Owner Oct 29, 2013  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
Nevermind.  I can be rather Forgetful.  I wasn't sure exactly what this was, but "island pendants" & "carved" stood out; without going back to reread it, they're the only words I Remember offhand.  {And "semi-colons" now, as I've just Reminded Myself I use them so often}

I finished a full-sized Taiaha last night.  Different Island.  I was up until after 3 in the morning working on it.  Well, actually, despite the symbolism & design, without traditional blessings, it is not Taiaha - *this is just a fancy stick*  Regardless, I'll send pictures when I can.
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2013  Student Writer
well no, it was that pendant I took a picture with, remember? it had something carved in the back. (this is about someone who doesn't use any)

you're way too hard on yourself. I know they look great.
Reply
:icongadgetsmith:
Gadgetsmith Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
I do Remember now, but I didn't at first.

Too hard on Myself?  Sometimes, perhaps, but not this time - Taiaha are more than finely-Carved sticks, and there's a whole big bunch of Cultural Significance Mine simply doesn't have.  Holy Water is just boring, regular water without proper blessings.  Same principle.
I'm still Learning.
Reply
:iconsilentscreamer321:
silentscreamer321 Featured By Owner Oct 17, 2013  Student General Artist
did you seep into my past?
ring forth my misery
before half mast?
like a chorus has been cast
you just reaped over my last;
love :iconbrokenheartplz:
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 18, 2013  Student Writer
:( I'm sorry

:tighthug:
Reply
:iconsilentscreamer321:
silentscreamer321 Featured By Owner Oct 22, 2013  Student General Artist
don't be

Fish
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
great reading, y-m.

I think you're really getting a handle on variance in voice.

you've really improved since your first readings.
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 17, 2013  Student Writer
yeah, I get pretty stagnant sometimes but I'm trying to work on it.

thank you :tighthug:
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:hug:
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2013  Student Writer
:tighthug:
Reply
:icondrippingwords:
DrippingWords Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Oh my word. This is just gorgeous and raw. Probably one of my favorites of yours now. but you always write such wonderful poetry it's hard to choose.
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 17, 2013  Student Writer
:blush:
always so kind and encouraging, thank you so much :heart::heart:
Reply
:icondrippingwords:
DrippingWords Featured By Owner Oct 17, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You are so welcome. :heart: :heart:
Reply
:iconkiko-d:
Kiko-D Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2013  Student Digital Artist
This is one of the most amazing things I have read. I relate to the words so well, it's almost insane.
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 17, 2013  Student Writer
oh wow, I'm sorry you've felt this but thank you so much for finding it so. <3
Reply
:iconkiko-d:
Kiko-D Featured By Owner Oct 18, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Of course! I guess as they say "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" and you deserve every bit of praise for this wonderful piece.
:)
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 18, 2013  Student Writer
no doubt about that, thank you so so much :heart:
Reply
:iconelecisss:
Elecisss Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
I got a ton out of this writing thank you for sharing!
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2013  Student Writer
thank you so much! <3
Reply
:iconelecisss:
Elecisss Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
Your welcome! +fav 
Reply
:iconglossolalias:
glossolalias Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2013
please perform this.

also, they're never worth it. don't blame yourself too much. learn and grow. etcetera.
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2013  Student Writer
you know I'm still terrible but the link's in the description.

:heart::heart:
(stay awesome)
Reply
:iconadrolyn:
Adrolyn Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Wow, I'm kind of breathless now.  That is quite a ride, and I still don't feel I knew where I was going.
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2013  Student Writer
maybe rereading it will help?
thank you so much <3
Reply
:iconroylapost:
roylapost Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2013
What evoked this?
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2013  Student Writer
I noted you.
Reply
:iconapplausejunkie:
ApplauseJunkie Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Heartbreaking in its victory.
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2013  Student Writer
:heart::heart:
Reply
:iconapplausejunkie:
ApplauseJunkie Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Please do not scrap this piece. It may be one of my favorite things you've ever put up here.
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2013  Student Writer
alright, could you tell me why, please?
Reply
:iconapplausejunkie:
ApplauseJunkie Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I don't know, but I think it wrenched my soul out of its socket for a moment.
Reply
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