literature

eight ways you've made me small

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your-methamphetamine's avatar
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Literature Text

1. I wish
this was for you.

2. my journal pages - the
brown one with all our monologues -
were jarred with hollow vows of
last poems of
loving me
loving me
loving me;
letting you slip into a coma
of bad memories, watching you
fall to your death off
a cascading cliff of disease
and dis ease.
it was never
easy for me
either.

3. there's a reason I ask
whether you're grey
(dark white, elusively black, in between)
or blue (behind the clouds, under wave-foam,
whateverthefuck runs through the back of my
palms); I'd rather have
you
than the arms
that once held you half-
heartedly. you had always been
my harmony and I
would have killed
to have been yours.

4. it could never have been just me, the way
it could never have been just
her.

5. disasters are not beautiful,
but how is it that you
managed to make my inner linings
converge into bows
and explode into wings the very
night you decided to rebuild your walls
to a lower height?

6. I wish this wasn't
about you.

7. I wish every part of me
and my sickly, spineless-book self
had been about you.

8. you have always been
everything about
me.
I can only write shitty lists now.
© 2013 - 2024 your-methamphetamine
Comments53
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213bri's avatar
This is so true you'd have to have gone threw this to write. I totally understand it.