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:iconyour-methamphetamine: More from your-methamphetamine


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Writing by MatieuCanadaWilliams

Prose by 91816119

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June 28, 2012
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people think it's weird - that i fold paper for a living.


i sit by a park bench, chant numbers under my breath and bend each fiber of light, fragile paper just the way i want.
because it makes you feel powerful? you ask. and i sit there and smile at the words that twitch the sides of your lips.


i sit here and watch that simple square turn into a crane right before my eyes - with my hands - because i can make it happen. i imagine my next move, anticipate an outlook and create beauty out of the simplicity of what the bark of the tree next to the bench twisted into from the paper in front of me. because you've been ugly your whole life? you ask. and i laugh at your naivety and inhale the scent of the rain.


the musky scent seeps into the paper and carries itself into the presence of the butterfly i folded. and it sits on the mantelpiece with all the other folded paper i find beauty in. i watch them on cold November mornings, when the fireplace is lit and the clouds sigh outside my fogged windows. because you're only capable of faking pretty? you ask. and i stay quiet while you parade around my sanctuary.


i inhale every scent on each of the paper folded beauties in front of me; rain, the park, the desert, strawberries. i inhale in a memory and let out a sigh. a painful, long-awaited, blood-tainted sigh. because memories are all they'll ever be? you ask. and i look down, too afraid to tell you you're right.


maybe you couldn't rest til you knew the truth behind life and death, or before you could find the right card on a random corner of the street (one that i haven't folded a living out of) or maybe you were just scared busy. maybe it would've hurt you if you knew how much it takes out of me to turn those memories into matter. because you're weak and needed me to hold you through everything? and i lie back down and hope you stop talking because i was too simple and in-the-moment to think that far.


my life exists in these folds. these folds i make to restore beauty in the mind that you ravished with your chocolate-polluted words. my life exists in paper-cuts and small bleeds because i love doing my job so much, i forgot i'm not paper thin as well. because you like to look at me and wish i'd understand your delusions? you ask. and i cry out to you, whimpering words of help that you're too tired to hear.


i was too simple and impulsive to think about the universe and determinism. most days i was just glad i could feel; feel the blood behind a wound, or pain behind my eyes, or the papery feel of the crane mobile on my window.


because people think it's weird - that i fold paper for a living.
"this picture needs a frame
and I needs a pane of glass
that can separate the subject
from the days that they missed.

our little microcosm might have blossomed
into something better but I doubt we'll ever know,
no, we'll never know."
-- god's favourite sketches; witness

from my old account.
i thought i'd show the prose side of a December too.
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:iconacxtiva:
Acxtiva Featured By Owner Edited Jun 29, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Such a stunning and breathtaking piece, i am really at a loss for words.
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:iconspiderwebwisher:
SpiderwebWisher Featured By Owner Sep 19, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Can I ask you, how you write with such a great flow and humbly, while still whispering, not exactly telling, the story inside the folds of the paper you fold for a living? I'd like to know. :)
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:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Sep 20, 2013  Student Writer
oh my, thank you so much :blushes:
i just.. i felt it (still do) so i suppose it's all just a bunch of experiences encapsulated in a piece of writing <3
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:iconspiderwebwisher:
SpiderwebWisher Featured By Owner Sep 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Writing. It amazes me.
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:iconbailandusilueta:
BailanduSilueta Featured By Owner Jul 3, 2013  Hobbyist Interface Designer
this is absolutely brilliant, honestly. I couldn't possibly think of anything to add or improve. I've read this like 5 times over already, it's that beautiful. Such a different, unique, unheard of metaphor and subject. It's delicate, and emotional, but in such a subtle, quiet form. It's almost silent in its speech, yet moving in the most quiet sense of the word. I don't even know if what I'm saying is making sense, but anyway, i love this. Love.
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:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Jul 4, 2013  Student Writer
aahhh. :love:
thankyouthankyouthankyou, love!
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:iconbailandusilueta:
BailanduSilueta Featured By Owner Jul 4, 2013  Hobbyist Interface Designer
hehe my pleasure
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:iconobsessednerdgirl:
ObsessedNerdGirl Featured By Owner Jul 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I love how "folding paper for a living" is not really what you think it is. The person folds paper as almost a way to live, not only a job. You're able to create this image of a heart breaking past that I can almost feel, yet I am still unaware of what exactly it is. Everything in this story is just put together perfectly. The questions that are asked, the way they can't answer them. The way the paper is a physical way to display emotion. It's just all perfect, great work.
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:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Jul 4, 2013  Student Writer
exactly, yes. you get it. :love:
thank you so very much for your comments, they made my entire week. :heart:
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:iconc-a-harland:
C-A-Harland Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2013  Student Writer
This is beautiful. I love the way you keep asking questions of the narrator, who never feels the need to give an answer. The motif of paper folding is very cleverly woven through, it's delicate and symbolic and including the references to paper cuts and the feel of blood behind the wound makes it that much deeper. Lovely work.
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